Pope Francis Brings His Climate Change Game

Conservatives Respond by Whining About His Eligibility to Play

"See you at the Big Dance, boys..."

Back in April the Christian Science Monitor reported that “on Tuesday, the Pontifical Academy of Sciences and other organizations hosted a summit at the Vatican called “Protect the Earth, Dignify Humanity: The Moral Dimensions of Climate Change and Sustainable Development,” billed as a meeting to help strengthen “the global consensus” on the issue.” One intended effect of this meeting is, we are told, “to influence this year’s United Nation’s Climate Change Conference.”

In their own press conference on Monday, before even hearing what Pope Francis had to say, conservative groups held a press conference to denounce the Pope’s stance on the environment. In doing so, certain conservatives did a fine job exposing the truth: that they are contradictory, hypocritical and unwitting masters of irony.

 

NOTE: I said ‘certain’ conservatives, not all. Because labeling someone does not give you the right to decry them. You have to wait until they say something stupid.

You can check out the Christian Science Monitor article on the subject here. Or keep reading for the two-minute breakdown of some grown men whining about a guy in a white robe.

"No, no, you're not going to Hell if you become a climate scientist, don't listen to those guys..."

FIRST HALF - Observations
A Staff Writer’s own words with bonus commentary

“With Pope Francis poised to issue a full-throated call to address the looming threats of climate change this year, conservative Catholic skeptics are crying foul.”

Waah waah! No fair! No fair!

“For Catholic conservatives, both in the US and overseas, Francis’s progressive views, combined with his overwhelming popularity with the laity, represents a challenge that some critics see as moving from the theological realm to the political.”

Yes, critics – who base their political views on their religious beliefs (unless it interferes with ‘contributions’).

“Pope Benedict, who was often called “the Green Pope” during his tenure, issued similar calls to protect the environment, though criticism was more muted for the staunchly theologically-conservative pope.”

And if my wife remembers to buy beer every week I don’t get on her case if she occasionally forgets to put it in the fridge.

“Francis’s popularity among Catholics could prove politically difficult for many Catholic Republicans, including presidential hopefuls Jeb Bush, Chris Christie, Bobby Jindal, Marco Rubio, and Rick Santorum, most of whom, too, express skepticism about the science of climate change."

Yeah, you know, we like the guy, but we think he puts a little too much faith in science.

"Come on, folks! Who are you gonna believe, a bunch of scientists or us?"

HALFTIME SPEECH

“Francis’s moral authority is so overwhelmingly huge throughout the world,” says Bruce Morrill, the Edward A. Malloy professor of Catholic studies at Vanderbilt University Divinity School in Nashville, Tennessee. “And I think that poses a huge problem for conservatives.”

Dang, the guy is so goddam moral! He’s killing us with that crap!

 

SECOND HALF – Actual Quotes
From a Couple of Men Who Really Seem to Believe Themselves

Christopher Monckton, a former adviser to British Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher and a devoted Catholic who has long been a leader climate skeptic movement (a leader climate skeptic movement? Nice edit job, CSM. I’m not even sure where the guy stands) said of Pope Francis (or maybe to Pope Francis, when he wasn’t in the room) “You demean the office that you hold and you demean the church whom it is your sworn duty to protect and defend and advance…Stand back and listen to both sides, and do not take sides in politics.”

You may, however, openly oppose abortion since so do we.

“Humans are not causing a climate crisis on God’s Green Earth – in fact, they are fulfilling their Biblical duty to protect and use it for the benefit of humanity,” said Joseph Bast, president of the Heartland Institute, a libertarian think tank based in Chicago, and one of the organizers of the press conference denouncing Francis on Monday.

And God said “Let there be mass deforestation…”

“Though Pope Francis’s heart is surely in the right place, he would do his flock and the world a disservice by putting his moral authority behind the United Nations’ unscientific agenda on the climate,” Bast said in a statement contradicting the vast majority of world’s climate scientists. (Italics mine, stupidity his.)

And on Fourth & Long…

"The Holy Father is being misled by 'experts' at the United Nations who have proven unworthy of his trust," said Joseph Bast, an expert who has yet to publish a single article on climate change in a peer-reviewed journal.

"I know, right? I hope we play against that Joseph Bast guy again!"

THE FINAL SCORE

Bruce Morrill, our halftime speaker who is also a Catholic priest, sums it up nicely: “People in governments – and not just Christian and Catholics, but people in the UN and other bodies – people have made a judgment perceiving his personal moral authority and wisdom and knowledge of our times. That is what bears the authority…”

And THAT is what these conservatives are really scared about.